Baby appointment

So I called to make my first prenatal appointment today. This was a hard thing for me to do. Not because I don't want to have the appointment but unfortunately it will not be with my midwife. Because of our financial situation we have had to be on Medicaid, which has been a blessing for us. And that is what has paid for our last 2 pregnancy's and births .... this time however it will be of no use to us because the Birth Center is no longer able to accept Medicaid. So, we start this process over... finding a new provider that will accept Medicaid. This is a scary thing for me. I am so comfortable with my midwife and already know what to expect with her and her amazing staff and know that I and my baby would be in excellent hands. I don't know how I will do this again. I have heard horror stories of bad midwifery from some and I don't want to be in a hospital hooked up to machines being offered drugs by people who are very "clinical". I don't want to be just another pregnant patient. So needless to say I am scared.... I'm afraid of the unknown......